The Liberty Beatitudes
Blessed are the extremely rich — and by “extremely” I mean “very extremely.”
Blessed are they that remain untroubled for they shall not be made awkward or uncomfortable.
Blessed are the go getters, the high energy types, the winners.
Blessed are they which are born into controlling interests for they shall make the law.
Blessed are the merciless for they shall obtain the satisfaction of causing others to suffer.
Blessed are they who eat the pure hearted, preferably raw and with a runny egg yolk.
Blessed are the opportunists, the sycophants, the toadies, and everyone else canny enough to grasp the situation and then profit from it.
Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake. They’re hilarious!
Blessed are ye, when men shall praise you, and congratulate you, and shall say all manner of flattering things about you.
Rejoice, and be exceeding glad for great is your reward for so flattered they the go getters, the high energy types, and the winners which were before you.
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