Don't Trust the Green Hot Dogs

One unfortunate day in  sixth grade

I found my hot dog was

A sickly green hue.

Green is my favorite out of all the colors, I still

Don't like it that much.

An administrator told me not to worry…

 The oven turned

The hot dogs that color. I

Didn’t buy it. I

 Wanted a refund,

But she warned me

The lunch ladies might get frustrated.

She assured me, in

An unconvincing tone, that

It would all be fine

And would be fixed in

A timely manner.

 Seven years later,

My boss’ son was about

To go into sixth

 Grade. I warned him not

To trust the hot dogs in a

Joking manner, as

 I thought by now that

The health department would have figured out

 Meat the color of avocados

Wasn’t right.

He told me the next

Day he was craving hot dogs

And purchased one. 

Unwrapping the foil, he found 

Questionable, sickly, oddly colored meat.

As is tradition. 


Gretchen spent middle school reading books and writing strange stories. Now that she's an adult, she does the same thing. See more ridiculous writing on her website.