Body, body, what's your name? Body, body, what's your game?
8 years old: “Hold your stomach in or you’ll look like your mother.”
5 years old, walking in the park with Mommy pushing Sarah’s stroller, “Mommy, are you going to have another baby?” Embarrassed already at that age when she said no, humiliated for having thought she was pregnant when she just had a big postpartum belly.
12 years old, Christmas, puking in the toilet while Dad held my head. “Do you think this might be the start of your period? Maybe you’re becoming a woman.”
48 years old: for the first time I could feel a little roll of fat fold over my belly. It was interesting and almost comforting to feel myself against myself. A (former) friend responded, “Oh God, stop eating! Get rid of that thing.”
58 years old: that little roll now sticks out beyond my boobs when I sit.
27 years old: 8 months pregnant and embarrassed to see my father because my belly is so large – what will he say?
17 years old: 150 sit ups a night, charted by my bed with rigorous fearful vigor and determination.
29 years old: Dad: “Women always get fat after they have children.” I exercise like a fiend, until I rock a bikini like I never have before. I am hot.
30 years old: Paul doesn’t notice.
17 years old: Freshman in college, I gain the Freshman 15 and am anxious about going home. I weigh 112 lb.
44 years old: “Chris, would you still love me if I weighed 250 pounds?” His 19 year old son pops in, “No way!” Chris responds, “Of course, but I might feel concerned about what got you there.”
58 years old: “Chris, I’m feeling awful about my body – inflamed, overweight, unfit, sore, uncomfortable. I don’t know how you can be attracted to me.” “You are so much more than your body. I am attracted to everything about you. Every aspect.”
10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years old: Mom: “Oh, I shouldn’t eat this – I’m so bad. I’ll just have this little bit. I don’t usually eat sugar. Just this little bit.”
53 years old: Mom: “The doctor says I might have pre-diabetes so I’m taking insulin.”
54 years old: Mom: “I don’t have diabetes anymore so I’m eating whatever I want, but really I don’t eat that much.”
9 years old: mom goes on a diet, loses 15 pounds. I see dad kiss Mom with love in his eyes for the first and only time ever.
23 years old: Dad, talking to my fiancé for the first time: “Make sure you like how her mother looks because she’ll look just like her when she gets older.”